Canthook

Murphy doesn't jump off the dock any more, trying to catch ducks. He's getting a bit gray, and he knows he can't catch them.

That's not my appraisal; that's Bill Marriott's. Bill, who is the head of Marriott International, belongs to Murphy. I suppose Bill might express it differently, but my redhead, Marie, insists that dogs never belong to people; it's always the other way around.

Bill writes in his blog that he's older and wiser, too. He's been through six or seven economic downturns, and he knows that Marriott will survive. Like an old dog, he concentrates on the things that matter - creating value by providing excellent hospitality services.

There aren't many corporate CEO blogs like Bill's. It's difficult to write well, and his posts are written well. The key, of course, is to have something to say, and then to say it. Many bloggers can't seem to get that down. He often "speaks" his blog posts, and an employee writes them down - and that's also a key. Many people try to write differently than they speak, and while there are small differences, a blog needs to sound natural, as part of a conversation, to be very readable.

Scott Adams, who draws the Dilbert cartoon, has only recently become owned by a dog - an Aussie. Aussies are high-energy dogs, and what's more, they're highly motivated herders.

There are two types of herding dogs. Marie is a Long-Haired German Shepard, and German Shepards herd by intimidation. That's one reason they're so popular as a police dog - they are large animals, and when they rush at you, barking loudly, you're likely to turn tail and run. If you don't run, the dog is likely to just stand there before you and keep barking. Not always, of course; some dogs are taught to be vicious. As a general rule, though, German Shepards are all bark and no bite. Even when they wrap their teeth around you, it's not to sink the fangs in; it's simply to grab hold of you.

German Shepards remind me of a story my grandmother used to tell, about teaching in a one-room schoolhouse. A mother brought her new student to school, and told Grandma that she'd never have to hit her son in order to make him behave. "Just hit the kid next to him, and it'll scare him so much that he'll behave." I used to complain to my mother that I deeply resented being hit because she wanted my brothers to behave. Mom, who knew that I was referring to Grandma's story, said it was my own darned fault, because if she hit my brothers, I didn't straighten up, so she always batted at me, on general principles.

Australian shepards and border collies are smaller dogs, and intimidation doesn't work well for them. Instead, they run around behind, and nip at your heels. It's not exactly painful, but it does sting. Sheep and cattle move promptly when urged to do so by a border collie or an aussie, and so do people.

And unfortunately, border collies and aussies have so much energy, and have so much dedication, that they herd whatever's available. Chickens and ducks are fun to herd, as well as people, and you remember that Superbowl ad about herding cats? Border collies and aussies can even herd kittens. By the time they grow up, the cats have learned that a swat full of sharp claws will discourage a herding dog, but kittens haven't learned that trick yet.

Scott remarks that having a new puppy has been quite a learning experience. He has been in a sleepless stupor, his IQ has dropped 60 points, and he is forming strong opinions on topics he doesn't know anything about.

Gee, is that my problem, that a dog owns me?

Other Bloggers On Related Topics:
Bill Marriott - Dilbert - dogs - Scott Adams